“Doesn’t he have a shirt?” Hell if I had a body like Taylor Lautner I’d hang out in the snow with my shirt off too. If I wasn’t casually flexing my pecs at Bella I’d be romping around as one of the most gorgeous werewolves to hit movies in ages. Friends of Bella should be loaning her InuYasha and telling her to practice the “SIT” command. Woof babe, drop that cold undead dreamboat and come be with a man who can keep you warm at night. I suppose that makes me a member of Team Jacob. Face it guys if you don’t care whether it should be Edward or Jacob just don’t do Twilight.
It’s easy to knock twilight. I’ve read some really venomous feminist critique of Stephanie Meyer. Some of the criticism might be valid: “Do we really need a gossip girl update of all the old Universal Studio Monsters?” asked one critic. Maybe not but it’s here and a lot of people enjoy the books and movies. Like it or not you’re looking into the psyche of a lot of women when you watch or read Twilight. Bella tells Edward at a key turning point, “It’s a choice between who I should be and who I am.” Bella Swan just isn’t a role model. She’s a proxy for desire, real desire, the kind you hardly dare admit to yourself even late at night. There’s nothing quite like kissing your boyfriend goodbye then snuggling up against his bare-chested rival as he carries you through the woods. Not to mention emasculating him again a short time later when he has to watch all night because he’s cold blooded and cuddles the wolf boy can put his hot body (hey it’s in the movie) next to yours all night. It’s enough to make even a civilized vampire go postal. As a man it’s sometimes terrifying to peek at what’s deep down inside women but it’s always fascinating. Vive la différence!
So I’d say even if that smoldering teenager is hidden deep inside you head out to see twilight. If you’re not a fan already bring one with you to explain why you should get excited about this detail or that. I saw a few confused looking husbands or boyfriends in the audience. On the way out there was lots of possessive touching and stroking by their ladies. They understood that all right. At least one couple didn’t make it home. Their car was parked in the pullout where Charlotte usually gets a walk. Getting to steam up the windows long after you’re sixteen is worth the price of two movie tickets.